how do i explain it?

i don't wanna write here cuz i'm busy writing elsewhere. good god.

maybe i need another blog hiatus, until i am either angered or inspired enough to write here.

a farewell kiss

because we have to send him off right.

i figured these would hurt the most, no matter where they hit him.

links for the week of 18 january 2009

i'm etsy obsessed, so here's some of the things i've found that make me REALLY happy.

from flytie, the babygirl gathered dress, sweet azul dress, and pop life sweater.

from sew sew suck ur toe, the frida kahlo softie! also, the dia de los muertos softie is awesome.

from my close personal friend mariam at the hand of fatima: a badass lariat necklace, the primp and proper necklace, & roses for claudia earrings.

go check out l'elephant rose! there's going to be a sale on until the 20th, and all new stuff in the store on the 21st.

because i think renee at womanist musings is a freaking genius, i'm sharing her post about her moon time.

finally, a new post at the bliss project, called first things first. :)

perfect doesn't exist.

yet i can comfortably say that i am perfect the way i am. every moment i change, i grow toward the light like a sprout. i am reaching upward continually.
striving toward my own satisfaction is what makes me perfect.
it centers me, gives me my reason for getting up each day, & will provide me with the legacy i wish to leave the world when i die.
i'm not here to lose, & quite honestly, i never have.

the plight of the fucking year:

how am i gonna be loved and sustained when everyone's either trying to fuck me because it's cute, or make me their healer?
i am fetishized
i am othered
i am dismissed
i am misunderstood
i am desired, yes
i am sexy, absolutely
but what of it when you're trying to get me to explain to you what sex with a woman feels/ looks/ smells/ tastes/ sounds like when it's not about that to begin with?
what of it when you're whispering behind my back to other women that i "just don't know what [i] want," that i'm greedy or confused?
that's the same thing as telling me i'm being picky while i'm in the middle of an allergic reaction to fish.

fuck.
how do i deal with the isolation that seems to come from being dedicated to being myself?
what do i do when all i want is to be held, and to trust, to kiss & touch & build without being put on stage (or on blast)?

some music, to lift our spirits.

the abundance mixtape by ppp (you may know them as platinum pied pipers). 

if you're a fan of dilla, slum village, or any of the bling 47 stuff, you're undoubtedly going to love this mixtape.

enjoy!

i am simply tired

of washing the blood from the hem of my skirt

not knowing whether it's yours or mine

hearing the blood curdling screams of my ancestors as they overlap with the gritos of souls aching for justice & peace.

may the ancestors welcome you, adolph grimes.

may justice be visited swiftly upon those who snatched you away from this realm.  iba ara t'orun.

(and, for good measure, fuck the police.)

links for the week of 11 january 2009:

becoming a quality black woman, by monica @ transgriot.

if oscar grant were an athlete, by the super hussy herself.

grand torino: clint eastwood and the white man's burden, by renee @ womanst musings.

aliyah's choice, by melinda @ muslimah media watch.

i haven't done a lot of blog reading this week. but if there's more, i'll come back with it.

i support the DREAM act.

it's quite simple:

people with the opportunity to advance themselves tend to be functioning, contributing members of society. if we have fewer of them, we develop something called social decline.  social decline means fewer teachers, fewer qualified persons to replace retirees, brain drain in college towns and states w/ great education systems, and all around suckage.

i don't want the united states to suck because people who came here as undocumented minors aren't allowed to improve their lives. especially if they actively seek the opportunity to improve their situations -- isn't this why parents would risk legal action by the US government in the first place? to see their kids improve their situations?  isn't that what any parent wants for their child(ren)? if we're allowed to go to the polls and vote away another person's rights, why can't we influence our lawmakers to grant rights to others? the right to incur obscene amounts of student debt and then work their asses off to pay it off? the right to go into the armed forces to serve in whatever capacity necessary?  there are undocumented minors who want to do this. so why say no?

to encourage the obama administration to pass the DREAM act, click here. to read about the DREAM act and the people who'd benefit from it, go here.

gratitude #8

peach iced tea
soulseek
bronzers
oatmeal
strawberries
sisterhood
solidarity
radical women of color
youtube
teena marie
multivitamins
water
growing hair
clean clothes
lace panties
rhinestones
friends who're makeup fiends
neti pots
piercing parlors
twitter
grapeseed oil
love

five things you can do right now about the oscar grant shooting.

(link courtesy of jay smooth)

Oscar Grant, an unarmed man, was killed by an Oakland police officer. Here are five things (compiled by Makani Themba-Nixon) that you should do right now to respond to the senseless death of this 22 year old Black man. Video footage of the shooting recently surfaced.

1. Digg the story so that the national media can pick up on it

2. Contact BART Director Carole Ward Allen and demand that 1) the officers involved be taken off duty without pay and charged and fully prosecuted; 2) there be an independent investigation of the shooting that includes a review of training and hiring practices; and 3) BART establish an independent residents’ review board for the police Call her at 510-464-6095 or email the BART Directors at BoardofDirectors@bart.gov

3. Call the BART police to complain about the officers’ conduct and demand immediate action: Internal Affairs: Sergeant David Chlebowski 510.464.7029,dchlebo@bart.gov; Chief of Police: Gary Gee 510.464.7022, ggee@bart.gov

Call them toll free at 877.679.7000 and press the last four digits of the phone number you wish to reach.

4. Talk it up on your blogs, networks and talk radio shows (call Michael Baisden 877-6BADBOY or Rev. Al, etc. to get this on the national radar)

5. Stay tuned for other actions, protests, etc., especially if you are in the Bay.

i'm not really good at this.

naming names, dates, times, events, etc.

i just know that militants are not the same as children playing on rooftops.
i know that if neutral parties are telling us that the news stories lie about casualties, & aid groups can't get in, then it is not about anything other than massacre.
women & children
robocalls, telling the ppl that hamas has abandoned them . . .

this is all designed to destroy them, and for what?

to assuage the guilt of the rest of the world for standing idly by when camps were built to kill jews en masse?
to spill blood on land that's meant to be holy? for what?
when they're all gone, what are you gonna do next? start firing at someone else?
the right to exist has nothing to do with a right to destroy other people. i'm sorry.

like i told bfp the other day, i feel more than i think about it & i daresay you're a chickenshit if you don't.
all that academic shit, all the historical citations and shit just give you a reason to be detached from it
because you know you could never sit idly by and watch your children and your neighbors' children die by the hundreds. because you know, full well, that your comfort would no longer matter if you sent your nine-year-old to the store on an errand and he came back to you only in the pieces discernible from the bits of other folks.

i
don't
fucking
like
this
shit.

public pressure. if you wouldn't dare advocate this shit in your own back yard, don't advocate it in someone else's.
all i want to do is scream because at the end of the day, this is about fighting over land that's important to everyone & really belongs to no one at all.

get into this: links 05 january 2009

first, cara @ the curvature's series on yoko ono.
part 1
part 2
part 3

i haven't yet read the whole series, but i'm loving part 1 so far. cara also has generally outstanding feminist analyses of all kinds of stuff, & i really appreciate her writing.

next up: lauren @ faux real has an awesome chicken pot pie recipe! with a few tweaks, this could be adjusted to meet almost any dietary need. om nom nom.

my first exposure to "barack the magic negro," via karas @ postbourgie.

the latest from the ever hilarious boondocks bootleg team, on youtube: black jesus is the cure. (this shit is funny. if you don't laugh, i think something's wrong with you. period.)

omi drops yet another gem.

a discussion overdue.

may these links fuel your thoughts & push you someplace new.

i am sean bell.

i got this video from jo, via a post at dawson's ink. i give thanks for stacey muhammad's project. i'm really quite speechless. teach the babies. save them. save us. & please share this video. peace.